CHOICE? let me understnd...

many faces. i've been hiding through these fake faces that isnt me. the attitude, the style, the mood, the personality, the whole being ... very different from each other. YES.! its all Jenny. my life is tragic. i dont know what JENNY should i pick? a story of black and white. a story of all good and proper. a story of all about faults and sh*ts. a story of happiness and sadness. ? i cant help myself. rarely i cant find mySELF. i dont know who i am. mybe because i'm terribly LOST and never will i find the way... when will i have happiness? peace? contentment? when will be the time that the right choice comes with the satisfaction and not regrets. when will i meet REALITY WITH SMILE ON MY FACE? i'm hiding with my very own. bratinella yet very afraid inside. fruitful words from my mouth yet inside me, i dont even know them. a brain with wit but seldom being used. how stupid i am? everything is a choice? what the f*ck does CHOICE really means? i dont think i have chosen this ? i dont really dont know.annnddd a huge "BUT" i have no one to blame.. but myself. LET ME LIVE.